Readings for today: Job 29-32
Have you ever hit rock bottom? Ever come to a place where you had nothing left? I think about the many people I’ve counseled over the years who have struggled with substance abuse. They often lose their jobs. Their homes. Their families. Eventually all the lies they tell themselves and others get exposed. All the manipulative games they’ve played as they’ve tried to hold things together come to an end. They find themselves with nothing left. Nowhere to go. Nowhere to hide. That’s what it sounds like to me when I read the final words from Job.
He has clearly come to the end of himself. He looks back with longing for the days when things were good. When he walked closely with God. When he was respected in the community. When he was able to be generous to others. When he had the energy and the resources to help others. He was sure this was how his days would end. He was sure his future was secure. But then calamity struck. His fortunes took a turn for the worse. His reputation in the community suffered a mortal blow. Now the very same people who used to love and respect him, mock him. The very same people he helped and served along the way now rise up against him. His life has been poured out. His energy and resources utterly depleted. His expectations of a long and fruitful life dashed. He’s tried crying out to God but to no avail. There seems to be no answer. Heaven is closed. He is alone. The walls have closed in all around him. There is no one to give him any comfort or any relief.
As I’ve shared numerous times over the years, I know how Job feels. In the summer of 2009, I found myself in a similar place. The ministry I was leading imploded, costing me several relationships. It was the most painful experience of my life. Members of the board I served under threatened me. Those I considered friends abandoned me. My relationships at home with my wife and children were strained at best. I was not handling it well. I made so many mistakes during that time. I tried as hard as I could to redeem the situation in my own strength. But the harder I tried, the worse things got. I too cried out to God but to no avail. There seemingly was no answer. Heaven felt closed to me. My prayers bounced off the ceiling. Finally, after months of spending hours in prayer, I broke down. I wept. I told God I had nothing left. My words were ended.
“The words of Job are ended.” (Job 31:40 NET) This is a good thing. It’s always good to exhaust our words so we can begin listening for God’s Word. It’s always good to shut our mouths so we can open our ears. It’s always good to come to the end of ourselves so we can find a new beginning with God. Over the course of my life, I have found God does His best work in the empty spaces of my life when I have nothing left to give. So make your final appeal. Cry out to God with all you’ve got. Exhaust yourself and your energy and your resources assailing the heavens. Know that God is with you even as you do and when you are finished, He will speak. He will comfort. He will guide.
Readings for tomorrow: Job 33-36